As a bridesmaid, you are not required to be an etiquette expert, however you do need to be there to support and encourage the bride in her times of need.  All you need to do is be fun, supportive, and responsible for a few tasks in order to help the wedding love boat sail without any snags.  According to Kate Chynoweth, writer of The Bridesmaid Guide, bridesmaids need to understand and fulfill several simple tasks.

The Bridesmaid’s Monetary Etiquette

Keep in mind that the bride in shelling out so much dough for her wedding, support her financially by simple things like offering to buy your own bridesmaids dress, paying for your own professional makeup and hairstyling, and covering your accommodation costs prior to the wedding and on the wedding day.  Of course the bride is happy that you are in her wedding party, but it’s not right to expect the bride to pay for you because you are her bridesmaid.  If the bride is trying to pinch every penny for her wedding and needs guidance, give her ideas on easy ways to save money on a wedding.  As you calculate in all these expenses, be sure to plan ahead your gift-giving funds, as you may want to give her gifts at her engagement party, bridal shower, bachelorette party and wedding day.

Planning Before the Wedding

The bride may be experiencing pre-wedding jitters, nervousness, excitement, happiness, sadness, or all of these things on top of her extreme stress!  Be flexible and generous with your time and offer her help for the preparation of the wedding.  Simple things like mailing out invitations, finding someone to do her make-up, or offering to pick up her tiara will make a be difference when it comes to planning the whole wedding.  As a bridesmaid, your main planning duty is to organize the bridal shower and/or bachelorette party for the bride.  With these events, you may want to consider different themes and decor, entertainment, locations, food, and guests.  Don’t forget to keep a record of gifts and envelopes received at the showers, receptions, and any other events.  If you are making a speech or toast to the bride and groom during any of their events, prepare your words and etiquette ahead of time and try not to be nervous.

The Bridesmaid’s Duties on The Wedding Day

This is it, the bride’s big wedding day and your duties as a bridesmaid really weigh in full swing here!  Be sure to attend the rehearsal dinner and ceremony early, prepared, and looking great.  No matter how tense and stressful things may get, always be positive and emotionally support the bride throughout the entire wedding process.  Always be beside the bride before the wedding and during the entire ceremony.  Help out at the reception by seating guests, introducing people, and making sure all the vendors are doing their job.  This whole process will definitely be easier if the bride has a wedding coordinator and you should communicate with the coordinator to help the bride.  Be proactive by hitting the dance floor, ensuring that the bride and groom are happy and enjoying their wedding reception, and make sure to stay sober enough that you know what’s going on.

Congratulations bridesmaid, you’re in for some responsibility and a lot of fun.  Enjoy every moment that you have with the bride and the rest of the wedding party. Be positive, fun and attentive as you support the bride throughout her special wedding day.  Remember to just be there for the bride in her time of need and don’t forget that she chose you as her bridesmaid because she loves you, so have fun!

Image 1 via True Bride.  Image 2 via Zoart.